Thursday 31 May 2018

#tiptalk - standing up for yourself ♥

Teal dress - H&M  |  Heels - Custom made |  Snake print jacket  - PLT
Since I arrived back from Paris last week, I have been relaxing in bed most nights and catching up with my old Sex and the City episodes. I can't explain how amazing this show is and how relevant the topics are, almost 20 years later. I always used to love Samantha and Charlotte's characters, but as I'm getting older I'm starting to identity with Miranda more. Her feisty, honest and strong traits are something I never had growing up. I would often agree and nod along with the crowd to make things easier but since I've started edging towards my late twenties, I've started to realise how important it is to be proud of your own voice - even if no one else agrees with what you are saying. 
For today's blog post, I wanted to have a little ramble about standing up for yourself. I don't know why it took me so long to stop worrying about fitting in or to stop doing things I didn't personally agree with. My best friend Jenny has also arrived at the same train stop as me. Neither of us hesitate with speaking our minds when we believe in something. If you don't agree with something, then speak up! If someone has said something that has made you upset or angry, tell them. 
99% of the time, biting your tongue with your friends, family or partner is a one way road that only makes you bury your real feelings. I always feel better and actually relieved if I explain and express myself when something is bothering me. This also depends on how you express your opinion, shouting and screaming doesn't usually work too well if you want to articulate your opinion and I have learnt that the best method is to explain your argument in a calm manner. When I was younger I really struggled with voicing my own opinion because I knew it would be different.
I was certainly not a leader growing up and of course, confidence and self-belief play a big part in standing up for yourself. I am incredibly confident and comfortable in my on skin but this has taken years for me to learn how to not doubt myself. I do wish that I could sometimes speak to my younger self so I can give her advice about not hesitating as much. I would bite my tongue for everything just to avoid creating any issues and I would worry about causing arguments or tension. This is such an unhealthy outlook because you are only bottling your own issues up. 
As corny as it sounds, believing in yourself and being comfortable with your surroundings is so important. Whether it means talking to your friend that has been making you feel uncomfortable about something or speaking to your boyfriend/girlfriend about messaging another person. Looking back, I should have spoken up about certain issues straight away and of course a part of growing up is learning that you have the ability to do this, but don't wait. If you are feeling uncertain or if you hate the idea of confrontation, remember that you will never regret putting yourself first. Taking care of your mental heath and your surroundings is incredibly important. 
I grew up watching strong female characters on TV, such as Buffy from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Prue Halliwell from Charmed and of course Miranda Hobbes from Sex and the City. Of course they were not afraid of showing their flaws, but they also stood their ground when they needed to. I honestly don't worry about what people think of me because I know that I have supportive and loving friends and family around me that respect my opinion whether they agree with it or not. Life is too short to just bite your tongue and to do something you just don't feel comfortable with. What do you think about voicing your opinion? Have you always been comfortable standing up for yourself?   
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2 comments

  1. What a wonderful post. I loved watching Sex and the City - and love how strong each character was in their own way. Each one knew how to use their voice and it is so important to do that. It is something I am learning to do more and more as I grow older!
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  2. We share some similar tastes - I too love strong female characters. including Shannen Doherty as Prue Halliwell in "Charmed" and Cynthia Nixon as Miranda Hobbes in "Sex and the City". I follow both of them on Twitter, and wish there were more strong female characters on TV and in movies. In fact I wish they'd leave out the males out of the scripts for a half century or so to even things up some.
    I'm glad you are strong enough to express your opinions, and though I may have stayed away from some subjects at a dinner, it's important to speak up, even though it's not always easy. It's good that you have supportive family and friends.
    You look gorgeous in that pretty satin dress from H+M!!!

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